Momentum Podcast: 310
Comparison Takes Away Your Power
by Alex Charfen
If you’re comparing your challenging day to someone else’s best day that they intentionally choose to share with you on social media, you will lose 100% of the time. Today more than ever we have so much inside access to peoples lives through social media. We look at successful people and think “why am I not more like them?”, “why can’t my business be perfect like that?” The comparisons are out of control, all it will do is drain you and take away your power to move forward and make positive changes for yourself. When you use successful people for inspiration rather than comparison, you gain your power back. Acknowledge how well YOU are doing, don’t live in a world of comparison.
Full Audio Transcript
So many entrepreneurs today feel like they're not doing enough, not showing up in the right way. Not creating enough, or not even making enough happen in the world because they're busy comparing themselves to other people, who are only showing you what's going right. That takes away your power. Let me show you how to get it back.
Comparison takes away your power. Here's the issue that we have in the world today, and it's always been there. The challenge for entrepreneurs, for people like you and I, is that when someone is successful, when someone is doing well, when someone is the public eye. We compare ourselves to that person. And we look at that person, and say, "Why am I not more like them? Why can't I have a life like that? Why can't my business be perfect like that? Why can't I have as much momentum as they do? Everything they have going on, the cars, and the house, and everything else."
And I think you know what I'm talking about. Now today this comparison, or measuring up against other people has gotten out of control. Because with the advent of social media, and how much access we have to people's lives, we now see a lot more than we used to see of the people that are in the public eye. And it has become way too easy to go to Instagram, start flipping through stories, and compare how great everyone else's life is, to how maybe mediocre, or not so great, or no so exciting your life is right now.
And if you're doing that, I have news for you. It is taking away your power to move forward. It is taking away your power to create the life you want. It's taking away your power to actually make positive changes for yourself because all comparison does is drain us. It makes us feel like we're not good enough. It makes it feel like we're not good as the person we're looking at. It makes us feel like we're just not making it. And these days, what happens to entrepreneurs, to people just like you and I all the time, and I've been there, and you probably have too.
When things aren't going well for us, we'll go out, and we'll look at stuff even more. That's when we go read the sales letters, and the marketing pages, and we watch the Facebook Lives, and we look at all of the things that people are intentionally showing us to showcase their lives in a way that we will be attracted to them, and buy from them. And when you go out, and you look at all the pretty pictures on sales pages, and all the advertising that people do on Facebook, and you read their sales letters, and you look at how they present themselves. One of the biggest challenges that you're gonna find is that having that life, the life that's perfect all the time. The life that doesn't have any challenges is impossible.
Let me just tell you this right now. No one has a perfect life. I coach some of the most successful entrepreneurs in the world. That if you went on their pages, and went on their marketing, and in their Instagram, you would think everything was perfect. And let me tell you something, everyone is struggling with something. And when we go out, and compare where we are to where other people are, we give up so much.
Here's what we should be doing: Use those people as a vision of what's possible. Use them as inspiration to show you what you can do, what you possibly could do, what is out there for you. And stop the comparisons because it takes away your power. When you use people for inspiration, you get the power back. And I want you to understand something, when you're comparing your average day, or even worse your challenging day to somebody else's best day on social media, or the veneer that they show on social media, you are going to lose 100% of the time. You're setting yourself up for disappointment, and failure. Because as entrepreneurial personality types, we want momentum more than anything in the world.
However, when we compare ourselves to other people, we can always find someone that's doing better than us. I've had this problem for most of my life. In fact, I've felt this way for most of my life. I'm really good at finding ways to make myself feel unsuccessful, and somehow motivate myself by feeling that way. In fact, I remember when I used to work out in gyms. When I was younger, and I would go into a gym, and I would look for the person who was in better shape than me, and use that person to tell myself, "See, you're not doing enough. You could be lifting harder. You could be pushing more. You could be doing more." And then I would.
And it constantly beat me up. I never acknowledged how well I was doing. In fact, I have a hard time acknowledging that today. I still live in that world of comparison. In fact, this morning, Dave Heitman, my chiropractor was here. He also does all of my workout programming, and has been working with me for a few months, has made massive changes in my life. And Dave and I were talking about a hypertrophy process I'm gonna go through. I'm gonna put on some muscle mass in the next few months. I want to just get into really intense shape. And I said this morning, "I want to get into really good shape." And Dave looked at me, and he said, "Alex, you are in really good shape."
And it knocked me back. I actually thought about it for a second. I sent him a message later in the day, and said, "Hey Dave, thanks for pointing that out. I forget it." Literally, I forget it because I use comparison so much when it comes to physiology, that I can always find somebody who is better than me. And that's pattern in my life that is, is almost as old as I am.
And one place I've been able to break that pattern is in business. I had to. I spent most of my twenties around people that were so successful, comparison would have killed me. I learned how to use them for inspiration. I was around people that worth millions, hundreds of millions, sometimes billions of dollars. And instead of using them to beat me up, to beat myself up, to tell myself how little I was doing. I started to be able to use them for inspiration. To see what was so incredible about what they were doing. To understand how I could use some of what they were doing in my own life.
And then eventually I was able to take what they were doing, and start showing it to other people. Turning it into frameworks, changing other people's lives with it. But it was only because I used them for inspiration, not for comparison. I would have always felt like I was behind, and I was losing, and I wasn't doing enough. And so if you find yourself comparing yourself to someone else, tell yourself this has to be inspiration not a comparison.
And then here's the secret to getting everything you want in your life: Compare yourself to yourself. Make sure that you personally are making progress on a daily basis. Make sure that you are setting up the right types of outcomes on a monthly basis, that you're chasing down, and make it happen. Make sure you have a strategic plan for your life, so that you can move forward in the way that you want. And stop comparing yourself to others. Compare yourself to yourself 30 days ago. And make sure that you're moving forward. That is how you're actually going to make progress.
Sitting around, and looking at other people, and wishing you were them is only going to keep you standing in place. Comparison takes away your power. When you use people for inspiration, you will get it back. If you're ready to change your life. If you're ready to start moving in a direction yourself. If you're ready to stop comparing yourself to those around you, and comparing yourself to yourself in a systematic way, so that you can make as much progress as possible. You need our Momentum Masterclass. This is our entry level course, and it is the exact same content we use with our coaching programs that cost tens of thousands of dollars a year.
It is the platform that every single one of our clients signs into first, so that they can get their personal life in order. Momentum Masterclass will support you when it comes to breathing, hydration, nutrition, and movement. It will give you the keystone habits you need to create more momentum as an entrepreneur than you ever thought possible. If you're ready to be physiologically supported, have your body feel vital, and ready to go every day. If you're ready to be cognitively supported, so that you're thinking clear. Your brain fog goes away, and you're getting more done. And if you're ready to be chemically in momentum, then Momentum Masterclass is for you. You should go right now to MomentumMasterclass.com, and check it out.
Thousands of people have used the concepts in Momentum Masterclass to create entirely new outcomes in their life. And who knows? If you take Momentum Masterclass, you could be the person other people are using for inspiration soon. MomentumMasterclass.com.