Momentum Podcast: 811
Develop this Superpower
by Alex Charfen
Today I held the call with all the CEOs who run companies in our coaching membership. One of our members, who just had his first two million-dollar month, asked a question about getting help. He has been struggling with hiring a personal assistant because he's tried a few times, and it didn't work out, and he feels like he has some mental blocks around hiring this position again.
In this episode, I share the advice I gave him that I learned from a wildly successful CEO who used to be a client of mine. This advice changed how I run my business and my life for the better, and it may do the same for you.
Full Audio Transcript
This is the Momentum podcast. Once a month, I get together with all of the CEOs. That are in our coaching program. And we just did that today. We call it the CEO only call, and we go through. A wide variety of Topics. But today a topic came up that comes up often getting personal help, having a personal assistant and having an executive assistant. You'd be surprised if you haven't been in this decision. Making process. Before with just how difficult it is for CEOs even of eight figure companies to get help in this way. But once you decide to, it can become a superpower. I'm Alex Charfen and this is the Momentum podcast made for Empire Builders Game Changers, trailblazers, shot. Takers, record breakers, world makers and creators of. All kinds. Those among us who can't turn it off and don't know why anyone would want to. We challenge complacency, destroy apathy, and we are obsessed with creating momentum so we can roll. Over. Bureaucracy and make. Our. Greatest contribution. Should we pay attention to their rules, but only so that we can bend them, break them, then rewrite them around our own will. We don't accept our destiny. We define it. We don't understand defeat because you only lose if you stop and we don't know how. While the rest of the world strives for average and. Clings desperately to the status quo, we are the minority. The few who are willing to hallucinate there could be a better future. And instead of just daydreaming of what could be, we endure the vulnerability and exposure it takes to make it real. We are the evolutionary hunters, clearly the most important people in the world, because entrepreneurs are the only source of consistent, positive human evolution. And we always will be. Like I just mentioned today, I held our CEO only call with all of the people who run organizations. That are in our coaching membership. And we had a question come up and it comes up often. From one of our members that is absolutely crushing. It. I'm not going to use his name because I haven't asked permission to. And he's actually a pretty private person. In fact, it's part of the reason. He asked this question. He just had his first $2 million a month in his business, which puts him in a $24 million run rate. Such an extraordinary number so few companies ever get to this size. And the question he had for me was he's having trouble justifying and moving forward with having a personal assistant. And I asked him why, you know, what is what is the issue with. Having a personal assistant? And he said what so many other CEOs have said he's tried to have one before. And what normally ends up happening is either. It doesn't work out. Or he ends up reassigning the person to help some other. Part of the. Business. And it was funny because on the same call we actually had two CEOs, one who asked this question and another one who had somebody leave. In a part of her. Company. And or leave a. Position in her company. And after reviewing the position, they decided. That they're actually going to hire two. People, one. Person to replace. The position, and then another person exclusively to help her. And I shared with her that I'm excited for her because getting to the point where you say, I'm going to have a person who's just going to help me is this massive chasm that most CEOs never get to. Most of us. Who are. Running a business never get to the place where we say there's going to be a person in the business who's just going to help me. And so the other individual who's running the $2 million business, I asked him, you know, why are you having trouble with this? Why do you think this is a challenge for you? And he said, Well, you know. I'm a private person. He's Australian. He goes, You know, I come from Australia and it's a place where tall poppy syndrome is real. You know, I just got back from going home and seeing my family and I can't really tell them how much I'm making. I can't tell them how well I'm doing because they just don't understand. And, you know, he actually has a. Father who. Will ask for more and will want something from him because he's doing so well. And so when you look at, you know, growing up in a place where when you do well, people kind of look down on you and they they try and tear you down. And he's in a. Position where he's doing. Better than, you know, I think he can admit that it's better than he thought he would be doing at this time. And now he's in a place where he's going to have someone in his business who is dedicated to making his life easier for someone in his business, who's dedicated just to him, to making on to doing what he needs to have done, to taking all. The personal stuff away from him. To making it so that when he flies and when he travels and when he has to get something done, that it's done. For him. And this, believe it or not, is an entrepreneurial. Superpower. So I'll share with you the story that I shared with him and with the rest of the people who were on this call. When I was younger, when I was running my first business. I never even considered. Having a personal. Assistant. It wasn't even on my radar. You know, I was doing so much for the business and trying to do so much for the company that it was something. If somebody had said, Hey, you need a personal assistant, I could have told you a hundred different reasons why there was positions in the company. That were more important. Than somebody just helping me. But I had this very intense experience. And if you've listened to the podcast. For a while, you've probably heard the name Howard. Johnson before, and there's a reason he's someone. That I worked. Closely with and he left a major. Impression. On me in so many different ways. He ran a company called Targus, the target's computer carrying cases and mobile computing accessories. When I started working with Howard, Target's. Was an eight figure company, I think 20 or 30 million somewhere around there, about a year and. A half after I had stopped working. With him. I think the company sold for $1,000,000,000. I can't remember who they sold. To, but I think. They sold for. $1,000,000,000. And so it was a really incredible American success story or just an incredible business success story. And it taught me a lot. Working with Howard taught me a lot. But really observing him, watching him taught me even more. And one of the things I was always so. Impressed with Howard was. When he showed up and we would go to meetings or we would be in interactions. He was so present and so aware and he always knew what was going on and it was like his entire focus was on the meeting we were in or his entire focus was on the. Interaction we were in. And through observation and asking them questions. I figured out why. Howard had the superpower. Of being able to. Ask for help. And as entrepreneurs, I always say, you know, we are that. That percentage of the population that we need far more help than the average person because we have bigger goals, we have. Bigger outcomes. There's more that we want to do. We obviously need more help. But any time we put. Out a request for help. It leaves us feeling vulnerable and exposed. Until we can get past it and until we can consistently. Ask for. Help. And I. Remember watching Howard. Who had a personal assistant in New York where he lived, who I think it was just one person in an. Office who worked for Howard and also ran part of his. Family office. But he did everything for him. He booked his flights. He made sure he was in the right seat. He made sure he was in the right hotel. He made sure that if we were in a city and we were going to go out to dinner, Howard already. Knew where we. Were going because this person had done the research and figured out the place that he was going to like the best. And Howard, who worried about almost nothing when it came to travel and when it came to getting things done and when it came to having. The right supplies and the right information in the right. Place. And, you know, I. Figured out through. Observation eventually that part of the reason that Howard seemed so focused in every meeting was this personal assistant. He had used to. Prepare agendas. For him that included everything with every meeting and the person he was meeting with in the last time that he met with him and what the outcome of those meetings were and having this person who helped him completely was it really was a superpower. It made Howard show up in meetings and be able to put all the time that he needed to. It made him present and aware. It made him be able to empathize and sympathize and connect with people at a very deep level because he wasn't worried about anything else. And I think that for us as entrepreneurs, this is one of those. Superpowers that. We must endeavor to develop. And I'll share with you. What I shared with my member. Today. You know. Is it hard to start asking for help? Yes. But if you don't and you're still doing things for yourself that somebody else could do and you're doing menial tasks, somebody else could do that. Somebody somebody could have a job that wants to do it, that wants to help you. Here's what you're doing. You're taking time from one of two places. You're either taking time that you could be using to grow your business, that you could be given to the business, or you could be taking time from your family or from yourself, from the things that you actually want to do. And so the mindset shift here is the more you're willing to ask. For help, the more you can grow. Your business, the more you're willing to ask. For help, the more you can show up in the right way for your. Team and for your clients and for your the people around. You that are that are. Counting on you. And it's a hard transition to make. And so if you've. Ever struggled. With this, if you've tried. To hire a personal. Assistant like my. The member who brought this. Up, had he's been through three and they either. Got redeployed in somewhere else in the. Team or they. Just didn't work out. I want you to know, every entrepreneur. I've ever worked. With, except for maybe one or two, has struggled exactly here, because it's hard for us to say there's going to be a person in the world that we just ask for help, because throughout our lives were the people who maybe have tried to get help and didn't get it. We've been through some type of trauma. Around. Asking for help. In fact, I study a. Lot around trauma and trauma responses. Because I see them all the time. In fact, it came up. Three or four trauma and trauma responses. Came up three or four times on this call this afternoon. Maybe I'll share in future podcasts a couple of the other examples. But I think there's a reason as entrepreneurs we're different. We have different sensitivities. In the rest of the world, we have different needs in the rest of the world. And there are times in our lives where we've asked for help. And we haven't gotten that help. And so the inability to ask for help, the inability to receive help in some of the latest research is actually a trauma response. And so I shared that with him. I share that, you know, when we get past this response of, no, I'm. Not going to ask for help, I'm going. To do it all myself. I'm going to keep it to myself. You know, what we think we are doing is. Perhaps. Being. Humble or perhaps we're being private, or perhaps we're just. Not demanding the help that we really need. But what's really happening is we are taking. Away from either our business. Ourselves or our family because we're not willing to accept that help. And so if this is something you've. Ever struggled. With, here's the mindset shift I want you to think of. You know, for. So many of us, we think being independent, not needing help and doing everything ourselves, being able to do it on our own, that that is a. Superpower. But I look at so many entrepreneurs. In the world and. The ones who are able to ask for help, the ones who know how to consistently get the help that they need, those are the ones that look like they have superpowers. Those are the ones who go out and. Change the world. Those are the ones who do. Of all things in the world. You know, I think of Richard Branson, who doesn't really functionally run any of the businesses that he's involved with. He gets help on almost everything. And, you know, and it's legendary that he is dyslexic and didn't even really know how to read financial statements until he was already running substantial organizations. Why? Because he asked for help. He had people around him who. Could help him. And so if this is something you struggle with, I want to, one, validate the fact that you're not the only one. Many entrepreneurs, most entrepreneurs, like I said, the vast majority of entrepreneurs. Struggle with asking for help and struggle with. Having somebody who will just help them. And if you're growing a business where the business is taking a lot of your time and you maybe have a family that also you want to be able to devote time to this development of the. Superpower, of. Being able to ask for help is going to change your business and it also change your life because once you're willing to offload the things that you don't need to do, you can get so much more of the right things done and you can get so much more of the things that will grow your business done. And so if it's hard for you, I want to validate. It's hard for all of us. If it's something that you. Really struggle. With. I want you to know I've struggled with it and so do the vast majority. Of entrepreneurs I ever have. But when you can start saying, Here's what I need help and here's how I need help, and you hire someone. Whose responsibility. It is to get those things out of your way. You may see your entire life and your entire business shift completely. Asking for. Help is a superpower. That you should develop. By the way, I just want to thank you for being a listener of the podcast. I was given a tip by a friend of mine recently, and there's a site called Listen Notes where you can look up any podcasts you listen to. You can even look up your podcasts if you have one. And I looked up momentum and we are in the top half percent of podcasts worldwide, not business podcasts. Not just podcasts in our category, but half percent of business podcasts worldwide. And you as a listener have helped us get there and helped me stay there. And so I just want to thank you and give you. My gratitude for being a. Listener. And for showing up and for hearing what I have. To say. And I have a request. If you'd be willing to go and leave a. Review for. The podcast. I would appreciate. It. I read every single review that there ever is. So if you've been a listener for a while, or. Maybe even if this is the first episode, you listen to, listen to a few more, and if you don't feel motivated to. Leave us a review, I would truly appreciate it. And I guarantee you I will personally see it. And never forget, asking for help. Is a. Superpower that every. Entrepreneurship had time and energy into developing it. But don't ever expect. It to be easy if it's difficult for you. You are not alone.